Seems impossible right?
Yet that's pretty much where I find myself these days. Now some 11+ months that I have been on this crazy ol heart transplant list. Still status 1B...second highest priority. 1A is the highest. I don't wanna be 1A anytime soon. Cause that's reserved for the sickest of the sick. : (
But for me...and let's just cut to the chase: I'm not anywhere close to the sickest of the sick...no need to be hospitalized or do anything too drastic like a heart pump just yet. Which is a good thing. (A reason to be HAPPY...hint, hint.)
The docs says I'm in class III heart failure:
Marked limitation of physical activity. Comfortable at rest. Less than ordinary activity causes fatigue, palpitation, or dyspnea (trouble breathing)
And there are other heart numbers the docs keep track of:
Ejection Fractions
NT-PROBNPs
Blah, Blah, Blah, etc. etc. etc.
Oh and my Gamma Glutamyltranspeptidase....gotta love Gamma Glutamyltranspeptidase. I know I do! That number is A-OK by the way.
Anyway, those numbers all come together to indicate I am pretty much holding steady where I am at. Not too hot. Not too cold. Just right. Not perfect health by any means, but things could be A LOT worse. (Another reason to be HAPPY...hint, hint)
Just waitin for THE CALL. Annnnny day now would be just fine with me.
The transplant team continues to watch me like a hawk. I see em every few weeks at least, and I even have a little meeting with my transplant surgeon today. And every time I get so much as a hang nail they seem very concerned, which is very reassuring if nothing else.
Don't get me wrong...Stairs still stink, and hills. Uggh. And I really can't keep up when we're walking a long distance...say waaaay around the block. Like a 1/4 mile or whatever. Pretty weak. But it is what it is.
But I can sit on my couch LIKE A BOSS! And watch funny videos and listen to great music, and listen to great speakers give incredibly motivational speeches. --More on that later...oh, and I'll let you in on a little secret....but I'll save that for the end. : )
Oh and did I tell you, I had a few roadblocks here these past few months. Ahem.
So in May, my pacemaker/ICD...I affectionately called him Marcus...you know from Marcus Welby MD? Binge watch it someday. Good stuff.
Anyway Marcus got infected. By who knows what; the pathologists could never determine just what it was. So a few days in the hospital on IV antibiotics, and another 10 days at home oral antibiotics, and they thought I'd be good to go.
 |
| 1st infection. Thought it was a rash. |
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| 2nd Infection. Eeesh. |
Well crud. Three days later, the infection came back. So back into the hospital I went.
This time the docs were playin for reals...yanked out Marcus, and I got a fancy new wiz bang ICD, whom I've decided to name Rocky. From...you know...the Rocky movies? I, II, III, IV, and V! Oh and Rocky VI called Balboa. And Rocky VII coming later this year I think, entitled Creed!
And things were going along swimmingly. Old site was healing...new site was healing. I was feeling groovy.
And THEN...just this past week, I had to have the ventricular ICD lead re-positioned cause it wasn't firing quite right. Hey it happens.
And it took two tries. Had to put me under and open me up twice in just the span of a couple days. Again...it happens. No biggie. Extra nurse time. Wink. Wink. Nod. Nod.
Oh, Hi Tammy. : )
The doc thought he could use the old ventricular lead and just move it to a different spot, but no dice. So he just went back in the next day and put in a whole new lead. Works awesome now. Just the way it's supposed to. Did I mention the extra nurse time...the extra CUTE, friendly, super knowledgeable, compassionate, awesome nurse time : )
The really cool thing about ALL those procedures...is that they all turned out pretty much perfect. Not 100% perfect...heck nothing, or no one, is perfect. But it's still pretty darn good.
And never let perfect be the enemy of pretty darn good. That's what my ol pappy used to say...except darn was replaced by #@#!$%!@!
So once again I've proven to be a fella who can genuinely roll with the punches and come out of most medical adventures feeling great...all things considered. And that make me and the transplant team ooooo soooo happy. (And being HAPPY is a good thing...hint, hint.)
Oh, and learned, once again that I am a pretty fast healer. And that make me and the transplant team ooooo soooo happy. (And being HAPPY is a good thing...hint, hint.)
So that's been my summer thus far. Just chillin..gettin some surgeries. Eatin some cake. Watchin the cat lick his nether regions. Listenin to some minor league baseball. Hangin out with my son and my girlfriend and trying to keep some normalcy to my life.
And just making a real concerted effort to find some reason, ANY reason, to be HAPPY each and every day. Hint. Hint.
Yep. I got my head screwed on straight this summer. Heck it's screwed on damn near perfect these days.
And never let perfect be the enemy of pretty darn good. ; )
You see, it's just that I have had soooo much time to think, about who I am, about the kind of person I want to be, not just when I get that new heart...and that new start, but here today, now. We live our lives...or at least we should...not in the past, or in some dream of a seemingly distant future. But Now. Right now...these multitude of split seconds are the 'stuff' that makes up or lives.
The Now. Now. Now. Now.
I took the time to really think about the kind of people and issues that I think are worth my time. and heck, I live in the same world you all do. I see the headlines and all the garbage back and forth that goes on in the news and on Facebook and Twitter. And if I spent any amount of time around that energy sucking negativity, I could just feel my heart acting up. And that's not good for anyone...and especially me. Emotions, good and bad, are HUGE in heart health. I wish more people understood that.
Funny thing...ok, maybe not so much, but there is a great thing called the OFF button. Use it once in a while : ) Or even the little hitting that 'X' on the posts that make your blood boil....click. Ah, sweet relief. And empower yourself by unfriending, or unfollowing at least...people that always gripe and moan about things. There is a growing mountain of research that excessive time on social media...and engaging in online debates are HORRIBLE for you. For you mental health to be sure, but on your body too.
And I gotta tell ya, being dead serious honest here...if you can somehow make that decision get rid of negative people, especially on social media, and filter out all the 'news' you can't really do anything about anyway...and instead focus each and every day on seeking out things that are positive and funny and uplifting, it will play a HUGE role in fostering the best possible environment for the best possible outcome.
That right there is my Numero Uno piece of advice to new folks new to transplant. Heck it applies to anyone facing any challenge in life. Don't let other people or the events half way around make you feel worse about this crazy thing called life. I feel really strongly about this.
I, Eric J. McClintock, 110% believe that has been THE deciding factor in me and my little ol heart not getting any worse these past few months.
You see, every day we have a choice.
There are like a trillion things to feel bad about if that's how you want to look at your situation and at the world. And frankly, that's what most people do. Whoa is me. Whoa is the whole effin' world.
But then....oh this is so great... here are like a trillion AND ONE things to feel good about if THAT's how you decide to look at your situation and the world. YOU decide. It's your CHOICE.
It's not always easy...and the Negative Nat's and Nellie's of the world are gonna try to suck you back in all the time. But don't let em...
Sorry this is so long...but it's good. A few more items here...
So what do I do keep my head on straight. I love, love, LOVE music. And I love to watch people doing awesome, amazing spectacular things. And wouldn't ya know it, the YouTubes is full of that kind of stuff. You just have to look for it. Here's a pretty cool one. And there are hundreds. Just search for People Are Awesome...or Epic Wins, That sort of thing.
And I JUST discovered these awesome AWESOME videos by a guy that goes by the YouTube handle of Scottdw. His videos AND music are mesmerizing, and fun, and POSITIVE. I can't tell you how much these videos make me smile. And Happy. (And HAPPY is a good thing...hint, hint.)
But check this guy out, and check out all his videos. Tell all your friends, and share share share. This is as good as it gets folks!
Finally there are some fantastic videos that give snippets of inspiring words by great speakers over motivational, uplifting music. It is so worth your time to seek these out too. You'll hear from names like Eric Thomas, Les Brown, Jim Rohn, Will Smith, Abraham Hicks. This stuff is great...and it really feeds the mind, and the body, and the soul. Here is one of my favs
And FINALLY, and I told you I had a little secret.
Well I guess it's not much of secret...but more of a revelation I guess...in my own life. Maybe it will be in yours too.
And it boils down to this. Before I thought I was ready for a new heart...and a new heart. But now I KNOW I have a new MIND too...and that will allow me, in a million little ways, to enjoy my new heart, and my new start so very much more. Woo Daddy...its gonna be a fun ride!
But I gotta work at it, and I keep working on it each and every day. And I am happy...THRILLED beyond imagination..to do just that.
We all...each and every one of us...could and should work on being just a little bit happier. Happy You. Happy Me. Happy World.
It's just that it's soooo worth it to be happy HAPPY in whatever circumstance you find yourself it.
Trust me!
Thanks for reading folks...and have a GREAT and HAPPY day!
